For X’s Sake
Why is Christmas sometimes written as Xmas? It should be t-mas, at least it looks like a cross. Xmas to me, just looks like “Timesmas” or “Tenmas”.
When else does X mean Christ? Generation Christ? The Christ Factor? King’s Christ? The Christ Files? Malcolm Christ? Terminator Christ?
My point is never. So why do we have X as Christ in Christmas? It doesn’t even carry on in bible studies, although it would add an eductional level:
If X died for our sins and there are 10 commandments, how many wives turn into pillars of salt if X=Christ.
a) one
b) Lot’s
Maybe X was Jesus’s gangster name with his disciples, like X-zibit, and they called him that when he went round doing the biblical equivalent of pimping rides. “Yo X, getting a little low on wine here, man.”
I think it comes down to laziness. I bet the Protestants don’t say X-mas. Not with their work ethic. They work like gurkas. Or gerk like workers.
I had a religious experience this weekend, at Ikea of all places. I was buying a couch with ugly legs, but I was going to replace them anyway. Then before the checkout I saw the bargain area where they have all the broken things and I saw my exacty same couch with a leg missing for half price. Bonus, thinks me, I was going to saw the legs off anyway.
I ask the guy when it will be delivered if I buy it today.
Him: “Monday.”
Me: “Great.”
Him: “Allah willing.”
Me: “Oh.”
It seems a strange policy. So if I pray, will the sofa arrive quicker?*
On a lighter note, King Fahd has died. I very much doubt oil prices with come down and the behandings will stop, but hey, they’re our allies, so that makes everything all right.
*This sounds almost too convenient for the purposes of this posting, but I swear it happened.