Halloween
I took the kids out trick or treating on Halloween. We didn’t visit every house, because it’s not a big tradition in England yet and some people apparently don’t own chocolate.
So we were just hitting the houses I thought would be up for trick of treating. Neighbours who had kids themselves or nice old people who always stop and say hey.
Halfway round the street we stopped at a house with a pumpkin outside, a witch model hanging from the light and a sign saying “Happy Halloween” on the door.
“Go ahead, kids,” I say sweetly.
They walk up to the door, a five year old centurion leading a three year old in a wizard’s hat and a superhero cape. Son, 5, knocks on the door with his axe.
Kids: “Trick or treat!”
Woman (in her early fifties looking embarassed): “Oh. Um, oh dear.”
She mumbled something about her cupboard and shopping.
I look at my feet and shine the torch at the pumpkin on her doorstep.
Wife: “Look kids. Pumpkin!”
Daughter, 3: “Oh yeah.”
Son 5: “Trick or treat!”
He came for chocolate and chocolate he will get. His axe taps against his bucket full of sweets.
Woman: “Um… I’ll see if I have anything.”
She comes back with two of those chocolate wafers you get when you pay too much for coffee in shops.
Us: “Thank you.”
Woman: “Umm. OK.”
She shoots me and wife an apologetic look before smiling at the kids and closing the door.
Now, call me ungrateful, but who would go to the trouble of decorating their house for Halloween and get caught out without sweets for trick or treaters. And this was early. We knocked at about 6:30, so it’s not like she ran out. She just hadn’t bothered. Shoddy.
Apart from the decorations.
I don’t get it. I felt like going back the next morning and giving her the Tom Cruise grilling (”Why would you do that?” “You’re a jerk.”)
Simple rule folks. Don’t put up Halloween decorations if you don’t have sweets.
Do put up Halloween decorations on other people’s houses and dress up as a centurion and go round and ask for sweets, though. They can’t refuse.
It’s the Law of the Pumpkin.
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