This Is This

I haven’t packed.

Not at all. A thing. Nada. Zilch. If I were a film director, I’d be Steven Sodallbergh.

I’ve been invited to a posh event early on so I need one good set of clothes, so the parka and walking shoes aren’t going to cut it. Which means either I travel in my good set of clothes or spend my first day wandering around Manhattan waiting for the shops to open. My fashion sense isn’t great at the best of times, so to impair it with jetlag and baked pastries could lead to a deportation order.

I’m a good packer, but I’m an even more economical dresser. It helps that a lot of what I wear goes with other things. One of the upsides of being colourblind is that you build your wardrobe around your limitations, so a lot of what I have matches, apart from when it’s blue, but I can see blue, so I have my blue days and my non-blue days. Easy.

If it’s not blue, it’s going to be a combination of brown and dark green and beige or lighter in the summer and I can’t believe I’m telling you this, because I’m not a clothes guy and I’m kind of self-conscious.

But colours I can’t co-ordinate. Flashes of red here and there. I don’t think so. Looks good on you, though. Actually, you know it might. I just don’t see it, and that’s where I would probably slip up.

Anyway, didn’t I say I was going? Jesus. I’m like a bad smell.

Oh, I always smell great, though.

Also on This Is This
If you’re anything like me, and in many ways, god I hope you’re not, you’ll understand why I think that my usual tuppenceworth of opinion served up with a side of gags should stay off the menu for a bit.
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This entry was posted on Friday, March 30th, 2007 at 7:02 am. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed, or you can skip to the end and leave a comment yourself.