Highbrow Reviews Of Ordinary Things - Part 2: Food And Drink
Findus Crispy Pancakes
Tarragon, balsamic vinegar, cayenne pepper and jasmine. None of these are in Findus Crispy Pancakes, and yet once again, the frozen food conglomerate has triumphed in the field of pastry-based processed foods.
Their use of cornstarch and potassium chloride combines to create a fusion of tastes, closely resembling not only the picture on the packaging but also the packaging itself, so intense are the textures.
Since the 1980’s Findus have developed the dish to the status of genre, but let vanish in the air everything you know about crispy pancakes.
Enjoyed with a divine latticework of Bird’s Eye Potato Waffles, they reach culinary heights to make spin the most lofty of taste buds.
Pop Tarts
Kellogg’s have elevated the toasted pastry to almost an art form and the new mochachino variety brings more to the table than many would have thought possible. Playing on our adult savours but appealing to our childhood desire to cover baked goods in icing and then toast it, the breakfast giant has created, in effect, the giant of breakfasts.
———
Related posts
Highbrow Reviews Of Ordinary Things - Part 1: Film and TV
Tomorrow: Seriously, I’ve no idea. I’m winging it. Any ideas? I’m not joking now. Look at my face.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:32 am
See now, this is why I don’t have a blog to speak of. No good ideas at all.
You know what might be an interesting take on things though- a blog entry that takes the form of a comic strip. I mean, couldn’t you just see the entry in Katy’s blog about her recent adventure in Shepard’s Bush as a comic strip? Or her Mixologist entry?
But you know… your blog entries are more a celebration of the art of the written word and its use in expressing your life views, and I’m not so certain that too many of your blog entries woudl lend themselves to visual caricaturisation.
I’m too tired to think of any at the moment but I will sometime soon.
May 21st, 2007 at 10:44 am
I do think you should have a blog though, Ed.
It’s years since I had a Findus Crispy Pancake. They were one of those things that we never had at home, because my mother cooked meals from scratch. It must have driven her nuts when I came home to chicken stroganoff and wondered aloud why we never had Alphabites and chicken nuggets like Sarah Clyde.
May 21st, 2007 at 11:32 am
Listen, Sarah Clyde, right. Her mum wouldn’t know a goulash from a nasi goring. Now hand me the zester.
Ed - you should so have a blog. That celebration of the art stuff? That’s incredibly nice.
May 21st, 2007 at 2:26 pm
We have nothing like Findus Crispy Pancakes in California. And now, this morning, I so want one. You guys are so lucky, living on an island far, far away. Everything is so exotic. The food is weird; the people talk funny. You’re, like, 5,000 miles from normal. So, I don’t understand why you call it a review of “ordinary things.” Haven’t they told you? Everything should be written from an American reference; otherwise, we get confused out here.
May 21st, 2007 at 2:29 pm
WEll maybe someday. I’m not feeling too creative lately.
May 21st, 2007 at 2:44 pm
Way ahead of you Tom. We don’t have Pop Tarts over here. We talk funny? You guys changed the accent! Funny THIS. Also, if California is normal, then we’re all in trouble.
May 21st, 2007 at 2:58 pm
YOu can change your normal by switching grocery stores, Tom. Everything’s in a differetn place, there’s different brands, and it’s all different. I have three major grocery stores near me, plus two not-so-major one, one of which carries a great deal of products imported from Mexico. Normlayy this is a really cool deal, especially when looking for banana leaves for puerco pibil or achiote seed. It does somewhat bother me, though, to see that they are selling soap that has not been approved for use in the US.
May 21st, 2007 at 3:04 pm
Nor am I, Ed. I’m just going to post YouTube videos until I think of something worth saying.
May 21st, 2007 at 3:05 pm
PS Cliff lies! Oh that is so bad. We totally have PopTarts.
May 21st, 2007 at 3:42 pm
Right. No more Bronze Club for Katy. Katy must now think about what she has done here today.
Seriously though, do we?
Also - youtube links please.
May 21st, 2007 at 3:52 pm
No more Bronze Club! Boooooo.
We do indeed have Pop Tarts. The idea of having them as, like, a meal… well, it would be amusing if it wasn’t so terrifying. “On your way out the door and no time to eat breakfast? Why not help yourself to seventeen spoonfuls of refined sugar?”
On the YouTube front, I offer Randy Newman AND the Old Grey Whistle Test. It is here. Complete with annoying talking at the start, for which I apologise. Even though I did not record or upload it. That’s the sort of person I am.
May 21st, 2007 at 4:08 pm
Oh, pop tarts. I can’t eat those things. I tried to eat one last week in the office and I had to ditch it. Evil and unnatural-type pastry. Felt wrong.
Now toaster strudels…well, that’s a whole other ballgame.
May 21st, 2007 at 7:30 pm
Have they managed to fix Pop Tarts so the jam (or whatever) doesn’t scorch the inside of your mouth off when you try to eat them?
Real reason for comment though, re: the us/them debate (for the sake of argument, us=British them=American) apparently Shakespeare and his cohorts would sound more American than British, if brought to us in a time machine. Once ‘they’ left they were more intent on preserving their language (official language of the USA was almost German, for a time), while we continued to adopt influences from all over the shop, regardless. That’s why they still say things like “gotten”. American = more archaic.
(according to Bill Bryson, at least, in his really rather good book, if you like that sort of thing, Mother Tongue)
(also ties in with your recent expat syndrome theory)
May 21st, 2007 at 9:01 pm
IT’s OK, Katy. Under my Gold Plus membership, I’m allowed a guest. You can join me.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:02 pm
You’ve got Gold Plus? Waaah. Everyone hates me.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:03 pm
Kathryn, it WAS wrong.
FB - apparently Elizabethans sounded more deep south than plum in the mouth. Phonetic tone poetry suggested they pronouced maid like “mide”. It’s almost a cockney intonation, but you compare it to Alabama and suddenly you’ve got it “mide in the shide”.
Course we’ll never know. And also - wow - including a link to another post on here in a comment. It’s a This Is This first. Bronze Club membership for you. Flattery will get you everywhere.
Katy, you’re back to Bronze, OK? Thanks for the Randy Newman. Let’s move on. We’re better than this. Got any JJ Cale?
Ed - Triple Eagle Platinum X-tra, people.
May 21st, 2007 at 9:29 pm
I’ve got a whole heap of JJ Cale right here.
Oh yeah.
(How many stages are there between Triple Eagle Platinum X-tra and Bronze Club? I’m thinking many.)
May 22nd, 2007 at 2:01 am
Ooh, a promotion! Cool!
May 22nd, 2007 at 7:46 am
See, what’s happened is that Ed and Katy commented while I was writing my comment. Ed, you were right, you were Gold Plus. Or at least you were. I was looking at the wrong list and mistook you for Ted. Then your comment came in and I realised I got it wrong. But I’ll let it stand.
Katy - Bronze 2nd Dan for the Cale stuff.
May 23rd, 2007 at 2:01 am
Ok, so I’m Gold Plus. Don’t want a promotion I don’t deserve;)
I’ll have to pay for the guest rooms then won’t I?
May 23rd, 2007 at 7:10 am
Guest rooms are still free but towels are not provided. I can’t stress that strongly enough.
Very noble of you Ed.
May 23rd, 2007 at 10:02 pm
KAty, I’ll bring lots of twoels.