Post That You Read
Ronseal make DIY products which are called “Ronseal Five Minute Quick Dry Wood Sealant” and they pride themselves in their straight talking product names. Their slogan is “It does exactly what it says on the tin”.
That last phrase had been adopted by most product managers in the UK and I’ve used it myself. I’m an editor, and any time someone wants to launch a new feature called “The Hubbub” or “Hoedown” or “The Patio”, I’m tempted to say “it needs to do exactly what it says on the tin”.
Now I was talking about Boots earlier on in the week and they sell loads of products that don’t come in tins, but more importantly don’t do what they say on whatever they do come in.
If Ronseal ran the show, Linx deodorant would be called “Gets You In With Complete Strangers In Public Places”. Decongestants would be called “Stops Large Globs Of Snot Streaming Down Your Nose Or Falling Down The Back Of Your Throat”. Incontinence pads would be called - well, you get the idea.
Then again, I’m looking at the title of this blog and it’s not exactly called “Makes You Laugh And Think Sometimes Through Observations By That Guy Who Has That Web Site”, is it?
June 17th, 2007 at 2:39 pm
“This is This” precisely meets the Ronseal challenge. To us regular readers of this blog, this is not something other than this but is precisely this. We know what this is. And to call this something other than what this is would be misleading, distorting, warped, turgid, unclean, feral, diseased and bushblairian.
Keep your fucking hands off the title, pal.
June 17th, 2007 at 3:33 pm
Um…
June 17th, 2007 at 5:02 pm
Fighting words from Tom, there.
June 17th, 2007 at 10:25 pm
So! Katy! How was the pizza?
June 18th, 2007 at 6:58 am
Sadly, Ed, I was struck down by gastroenteritis very shortly after eating it. (This is not a joke, but true.)
June 18th, 2007 at 7:08 am
Katy -No - seriously?
Tom, I guess the tin stays as it is.
June 18th, 2007 at 7:17 am
Check out my Facebook status update.
June 18th, 2007 at 7:22 am
Oh, but I think it was a Pizza Hut pizza. My little brother will only eat Pizza Hut.
June 18th, 2007 at 7:38 am
Oh yeah, as part of the club membership discount at Dominos, I should have said not to eat anyone else’s pizzas over the next four weeks. Actually, six weeks. Just to be safe.
June 18th, 2007 at 8:45 am
I think that you should leave the title of this blog as it is, primarily because not once has it ever made me laugh.
:)
June 18th, 2007 at 9:01 am
Unlike that comment Pete. Cheers.
June 18th, 2007 at 3:44 pm
I am sorry to hear of your distress, Katy. It’s because of teh pizza guy I am sure.
I can’t seem to find you on Facebook.
June 18th, 2007 at 3:47 pm
Thanks for keeping the title, Cliff. Yes, Katy, my words were fighting. “Turgid” and “unclean” were trading punches; I had to send them outside for a while until they calmed down.
But sometimes you have to stand up for what you believe. Did I mention that I wrote that comment standing up?
The Ronseal title of THIS comment, btw, is “Another strained effort at being a tad funny but it isn’t.”
June 18th, 2007 at 7:36 pm
OK, I found Cliff, and Wendy, and possibly Anna of Little Red Boat fame, on Facebook- but no Katy Newton. Darnit.
June 18th, 2007 at 8:18 pm
Ed - Hard to believe, but not everyone’s on Facebook.
June 18th, 2007 at 8:21 pm
But Katy said to check out her status update on Facebook, so I assumed she was on Facebook.
June 19th, 2007 at 9:33 am
Ed: Which suggests that she’s lying about her name (either there or here). Just scroll down Cliff’s friends list and see who looks the most gastroenterisisy. Or poke them all and see who moans in pain.