A Little Off The Top
October 11, 2007
Bloggers are often accused of navel-gazing, but today I’d like to aim higher and tell you about my hair.
I keep it fairly short because my hair is kind of curly. Not like Robert Plant/Leo Sayer curly, but not staight like Jackson Browne/Jim Carey.
It’s kind of in between, on the outskirts of unmanageable, but not out of control. If my hair were an employee, I’d probably be thinking about some kind if performance plan rather than a straight out verbal warning.
In terms of celebrity, I have Tom Hanks hair. About one in twenty-five people have it and it’s not a big deal. I get up, I go to work, I raise a family, I eat what I like – I lead a full life. Seriously, though – I have Tom Hanks hair. A little lighter, but Tom Hanks hair.
I keep it fairly short. Not Forrest Gump length, because all short hair looks like Forrest Gump hair. But let it get a bit longer, and – hello! – Turner and Hooch.
Longer still and we’re talking Splash, and, before you know it, you’re looking at Bosom Buddies. And not in a good way.
I’ve had it very long, a la Castaway, and very very short, in the Apollo 13 style.
Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for the similarity even though it ends there. In fact it’s useful, because I can picture what my hair will look like longer just by running through a mental checklist of his work.
As an aside, I think he is a great actor, but my friend Paul disagrees. He says that Tom Hanks will aways be Forrest Gump, the simple, dorkey, loveable guy next door.
For this reason, he calls all Tom Hanks films by their relative names. So you have Forrest Gump And The Mermaid, Big Forrest Gump, Forrest Gump In Space, Forrest Gump Goes To The Baseball, Forrest Gump With Aids, Forrest Gump Has Mail and Forrest Gump And The Nazis.
Paul has normal hair. Kevin Costner/Matt Dillon/Al Pacino normal hair.
9 comments
You should try the Forrest Gump with Hookers look. I think they would suit you.
Good idea Wendy – I have a feeling you’re not talking about a Tom Hanks rubgy movie.
“Forest Gump with Aids”
I literally spat.
I have SLy Stone hair. Not Sylvester- Sly as in ‘The Family’ Stone.
If I let it grow long it doesn’t fall to my shoulders, it sticks straight out.
You’re right Cliff. I’m talking about Forest Gump has a stag night like you’ve never seen and then some prostitutes end up putting on a show at the hen do.
We’d call that Crystal Tips hair, Ed.
Like I’ve never seen? I might have seen. You don’t know. I have a past.
Ed – It’s family of hair.
Sorry Cliff. I should have said like “I’ve” never seen. I’m not allowed at stag nights unless I’m on duty.
Coming back to the subject at hand, though, how about Forrest Gump and the Deluded Space-toy or Forrest Gump and the Volleyball?
Love it.
I’ve got:
Forrest Gump Can’t Sleep
Forrest Gump Sleeps In An Airport
Forrest Gump Buys A House
Forrest Gump vs The Volcano
I can’t believe we forgot…
Forrest Gump Cracks Some Codes with a French Bird
Forrest Gump on a Very Cold Train
Forrest Grump in the Clink (good job he’s not athletic with delicate features)
Leave a comment. Play nice. I will turn this blog around.