Wanted
Bee costume for small animal for purposes of web journal-based comedy sidekickery. No timewasters.
I had this dream where it fell to me to polish the moon. This notion probably came from me having a new job, increased personal responsibilities and more fresh air than I’ve been getting for a while.
It was my responsibility to me to take the moon down every evening and give it a good shine. That was no problem – it was about the size of a large dish when I was holding it, although I knew it was much bigger.
After buffing it to a shine I could see my face in, there was the problem of putting it back. I was really worried about getting it wrong, because it had to be placed just right in its exact orbit.
Night after night, in my dream I would steady my hand and nerve as I resolved not to mess up what I didn’t really understand: the tides, the navigating moths, the phases. I didn’t even know the names of the phases. Waxing gibbons? Heh. That can not be right.
Yet there I was taking the moon down every evening and somehow it was going OK.
Puppy is good, despite a very difficult week.
And you can tell everybody that this is your post./This week was quite tricky but now that it’s toast/I hope you don’t mind, I hope you don’t mind that I’ve put down in a blog/how wonderful life is now I’ve got a dog.
HAGW.
April 4th, 2008 at 9:53 am
Don’t do it. Seriously. Just don’t. One, it’s been done before. And two: just… just don’t.
April 4th, 2008 at 10:28 am
I won’t. Also - your hotlinked name in the comments goes to your old site, by the way. You might want to change your WP login profile configeration aspect ratio proxy ftp source code CCS tag file upload stylesheet . That’s all.
April 4th, 2008 at 1:44 pm
i’m far more upset about the song lyrics than the bee costume.
April 4th, 2008 at 1:45 pm
And the dream is very interesting, but I’m so disturbed over the song lyrics that I can’t think straight.
April 4th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Dressing a dog in a bee costume is just incontrovertibly wrong.
I would, however, say that I have an open mind to the prospect of the reverse.
Just sayin’.
April 4th, 2008 at 4:43 pm
I love that last bit when you changed the words to Your Song. Good post, crazy dreams are cool. I dreamt I was flying last night and that I knew karate and was fighting in the air against a raccoon. Wonder what that means? To empty the rubbish?
April 4th, 2008 at 7:19 pm
I don’t understand. I’d love to see the pug in a bee costume. What’s wrong with you all?
Any costume. Dress him up as a flamenco dancer, or a hula girl, or a baby, or a rabbit, or space rocket, or a carrot.
April 4th, 2008 at 9:56 pm
Ed - For you
Jonners - Now there’s an original idea. You don’t get many of those here.
Kathryn - Thanks. You obviously hated your mother.
Sam - You are a sad, strange little man. But I like you. You can stay.
April 5th, 2008 at 12:15 am
Cliff you have to dress the pug up as a carrot STAT.
April 5th, 2008 at 4:34 am
um I won’t say how many pages I went through on the bee dog site but I will say this there are a number of pugs who have been subjected to this kind of thing. I cannot say the exact number but I think this is the kind of thing that needs to be exposed about the danger to pugs. (check out lemon) http://beedogs.com/index_files/page0020.htm
A number of the other kinds of dogs looked mad and maybe even threatened their owners that if they put these pictures on the internet they would pay for it later. one of the dogs with the baby….He knew what was going on but the kid didn’t have a clue. I’m sure the dog promised to one day divulge what had been done to them both.
even among all that though what I found most frightening was not the bee dogs but the lady bugs (check out ping) http://beedogs.com/index_files/page0013.htm
April 5th, 2008 at 6:55 pm
Cliff, you’re a connoisseur, I can see that…
April 7th, 2008 at 11:32 am
You could change your name to Harvey Moon and all your family could sing “shine on, shine on Harvey Moon” while you polished.
Is it only me that remembers that programme? Did I dream it? Also, it is only in recent times that I realised it is a pun on ‘Harvest Moon’.