This Is This

Often at work I’ll go downstairs and have lunch in one of the canteens. I don’t get much time alone so it’s nice to step out, grab a coffee and read a book for half an hour.

The toilets are next to the lifts and some way from my desk, so I’ll grab by book and head out.

The problem is that I don’t like walking out of the toilets with a book, because it suggests that you have done a poo. Carrying literature out of the toilet shows a level of planning and consideration not normally reserved for calls of nature, especially ones at work.

But what can I do? Why should I have to walk back to my desk to get my book and then head out.

What makes things worse is that the toilet blocks at work are unisex, which throws up a whole new protocol of shitiquette.

A woman as she goes in could look at me coming out of the toilets with a book and think I done a poo, for which there is no terms of engagement.

“I’m heading out to eat.”

No.

“I’d give it a couple of minutes if I were you.”

No.

The best you can do, is not to hide the book, avoid all eye contract and head for the canteen, hoping you are not sharing a table with her later. Which is my school days all over again.

Everyone: Awwwwww.

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